Coltin's Letter

I received a letter from my brother this week..

“I know I have never been your most favorite brother. I would like to ask you for forgiveness for any and all wrongs I have done you. Why you may ask? I have had a lot of time to dwell on all the wrongs I have done to everyone. If I would be granted your forgiveness, it would be easier to live with myself. Thank you. It would lighten my heart to know you still love me for a brother. I know I am asking a lot of you. I’m not expecting much”
Sincerely & Lovingly Your Brother Coltin Palmer

I cry almost every time I read through this part of his letter. Mostly the letter just sits on my bedside table and I try to ignore it. I wasn’t expecting a letter from him let alone him saying anything of the sort. Maybe this is the point where I should mention.. my brother Coltin is in the State Penitentiary Jail for a really long time. His actual sentence is for 15 years, tho my mom prays the time will be shorter. One might ask, what are my thoughts are about all of this? This is a question I am constantly being asked by people but on my end.. I am constantly avoiding the answer. I am not going to go into details of what put him there. It’s all just pain and heartache for me and my entire family. I know I need to reply to his letter but I honestly have no clue what I would say. I am already having a such a hard time with putting recent events behind me (hence my last post) Now since getting Coltin’s letter, I have had so much more stress put on my plate. I feel like my past is being dug up and even more questions are piling up on top of the questions I mentioned in my last post. Gah!.. I’m so exhausted from just thinking about all of this! I need more time.. I wish I could talk to Bill. He already knows the situation more than even my family. I feel as tho I am back to square one with no one to talk too.. at least no one who could remotely understand the situation. The Lord will step in.. I know He will. I just need to be patient.